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Monday, 23 May 2011


Well, the doctor called on Friday, but couldn't get through to us as we were driving and may have been out of range. Don't know - anyway, she called Adrian instead, and basically confirmed that it's not good... She said that things have been known to turn around, but that we should prepare for the worst.

The rational part of me knows that it is VERY probable that the little traveler's life is coming to an end soon... possibly, it has already happened. So it is extremely frustrating and rather infuriating, actually, that the other part of me, let's just call it the instinctive part, is screaming: 'This is all bullshit! Everything is fine!!!'

I don't know why. I guess that the positive side of me just refuses to give up. I was so convinced that this was going to work the first time - I probably talked myself into the mindset so deeply, that now I find it hard to believe anything else. Or, hopefully, everything will really turn out fine. I would love to be able to not to hope - it would make things so much easier. But I just can't. So I hope.

We'll have a better idea after tomorrow's blood test.

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